Buying a wedding

This wedding business is stupidly expensive. We knew it, we didn't enter into it with blinders on, we thought we were prepared. And in a way, we're still prepared. We decided to not set a budget. That's right--this is a no budget wedding! All it mostly means, though, is that we're not shooting for a magic number.

A lot of wedding budgeting books and articles encourage being vague with vendors and ceremony/reception sites. Instead of reception, tell them it's a party! Instead of wedding ceremony, say it's a meeting! Stupid stuff, I tell you. It seems so dishonest and untrustworthy. I think a lot of wedding-related price markups have to do with the vendor feeling like if something isn't expensive enough, it'll be seen as too cheap for a wedding, since most people buy into the Wedding Industrial Complex and like to spend as much as they can on their Special Day (barf).

We thought about prevaricating a bit when beginning to talk to vendors, but then we realized that they aren't stupid: they're going to figure it out. They've probably had these conversations millions of times. And then you suddenly have this relationship that's built on lies and half truths, and really, what good does that do anyone? Just tell the truth--either something works for you, or it doesn't. If you need a better price, see if the vendor can work with you and your different price. If they can't, well, maybe you need to rethink your grand idea. Part of the reason we decided to change our reception place was due to catering restrictions and cost. It was a hard decision, and one we struggled with, but ultimately, we'll hopefully be happier (and have more money for other things). That's what it's about--finding what works for you and making it happen. It might take a bit more elbow grease, it might cause a few stupid fights (...), but as long as you're honest with the vendors and honest with each other, it'll work out. This wedding stuff is serious business, after all.