You know what else?

I ask Alan to tell me if my outfit works every morning. And I think he's usually truthful.

This makes it easy when we go shopping (like on Saturday) and I ask him if he likes something I'm thinking about buying. It means he can say something like, "it looks like it was made for you." And then I buy it! And he is happy for me!

I do the same for him, when he asks (he does not ask as often as I do). And I'll often buy him something--usually a sweater, usually when I'm on an errand that takes me by Banana Republic--without consulting him first. So far, he's liked it all. Because it all looks like him!

On Marriage

What a lofty title, eh? But I couldn't think of anything else; this post is, after all, about marriage. By and large, nothing's really changed now that we're Married. That's how people say it, when one is newly wed: Married. "Oh--you're Married?" "Did you hear? She's Married!" "How's Married life?" And briefly, one identifies as Married (note the capital M). But after a week or two, it wears off (to me, anyway) and one is just...married. Our life is basically the same, except we're no longer burdened with planning and executing a wedding. Wheee! We've spent more time together the past couple weeks than the several months leading up to the wedding: neither of us has had a show, we've both had regular work schedules, and we got to take a whole week of vacation!

There are little differences, of course. We purged a lot of stuff to make room for new stuff (our towels have never been so nice!). We took time to really clean the house and deck a few weeks ago, after spot cleaning here and there for months. We talk about buying a house--should we or shouldn't we, if we do then where, what our theoretical budget might be. We talk about trying to move to a bigger place since ours is so very tiny, and we might try to go month-to-month on our lease next year for more flexibility. Our wedding checklist is shortly going to be erased and turned into a travel checklist.

Does Alan still do things that annoy me? Yep. Do I still do things that annoy him? Oh yeah! Husband and wife are just parts of who we are, the titles don't define us anymore than when we were boyfriend/girlfriend or fiance/fiancee.

Mostly, we're just relieved to be married. Little m.

While My Uke Gently Weeps

A couple of friends will be playing the Ukulele at our wedding. They will not be playing this song. I think they would have had heart attacks had we asked them to:

Wedding Shorts

We've started getting gifts! It's so much fun. As I was saying to one of my attendant's:

It's so neat! We asked for it, and we got it! It's like delayed shopping without having to pay for it. So really, it's more like delayed shop-lifting without the risk of imprisonment.

**

We picked up our marriage license from Alameda County this morning. We're all set! We were the first one's in line when they opened. Lots of people were there for the same thing. We got a handy little booklet from the State of California called "Your Future Together: Health Information You Need to Know" with information on the Name Equality Act of 2007, Living a Healthy Lifestyle, Domestic Violence, HIV/AIDS, Planning a Family, and During and After Pregnancy. How do unmarried people and homosexuals go through life without access to this important information?

Crisis Averted

Mehserle sentencing pushed back to Nov. 5

Friday August 6th

Former BART cop Johannes Mehserle was convicted today of involuntary manslaughter and of using a gun while committing a felony in the death of Oscar Grant.

Mehserle (white) shot Grant (black) while Grant was laying face down on the BART platform. Mehserle claims he was reaching for his newly issued taser and accidentally pulled his gun.

All of this was caught on tape.

What does this have to do with the wedding? Sentencing has been set for Friday August 6th. Due to the combination of convictions, he can get a minimum of 5 years to a maximum of 14. However, the defense can argue for him to get probation with no prison time at all because he was convicted of manslaughter not murder. It is unclear whether or not the second conviction of using a gun while committing a felony requires Mehserle to receive prison time.

If he gets off with probation and no jail time, one could expect mass protests in the City of Oakland and on BART the night of our wedding rehearsal.

Just something to keep an eye on.

Whoops!

RSVP fail: we forgot to put a date to répondez s'il vous plaît BY.

So...just RSVP. Please.

Working on the Ceremony

We've started working on the ceremony. What do you think about this for the ring exchange:

One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

What? Not appropriate? Well... ok. I guess we'll go with something else.

Holy Crap!

We've been very wedding-oriented lately, after not doing much for the past...several months. In the past couple weeks, we've created registries, Alan got his great-grandfather's ring sized, I've purchased a veil and some jewelry, we've sort of narrowed down the reception foodstuffs, and we've decided on wording for the invitations! Oh, and we have the name of a florist that I need to call tomorrow.

The most exciting thing, I think, is that Alan was able to find a place that could size the ring without harming the inscription inside. This ring is from 1895, you guys, and was a couple sizes too big for Alan's slender finger (is it a surprise that his fingers are skinny? Not at all.). Fortunately, the goldsmith who appraised my engagement ring is, duh, a goldsmith, and was able to preserve the entire inscription. We had worried about it because when I bought my wedding ring, the jeweler at the store said that they might have to cut out part of Alan's ring to properly size it, and Alan was none too pleased. It was quite a boon, therefore, to find a goldsmith.

And the registering is also exciting, but completely overwhelming at the same time (how many plates? How many glasses? Towels? Do we NEED a waffle iron? What about luggage? Chip and dip platters?). Our house is SO tiny that it's hard to consider the future when what we own barely fits. But it is exciting to think that, one day, when we move into a place that's bigger than half a small house, we'll have lovely things that will remind us of our wedding and of these days when our little family is just the two of us, branching off from our respective bigger families.

The Macy's registry website tells us we have 55 days until the wedding. HOLY CRAP.

ALSO, today is the one year anniversary of our engagement in Paris! It's the one anniversary we can agree on. Yay us!

Wedding shoes

From the beginning of this whole process, I've been more focused on what shoes I'll wear than what dress. I care about the dress, yes, but it's not something I can necessarily wear again, even if it wasn't ivory. I mean, I'm not exactly making the cocktail party circuit once a week. Or even once a month, for that matter. My dress is short, and my shoes will be (quite) visible. So, shoes? Muy importante.

I decided on these:



They were expensive (cost more than my dress!) but they are AWESOME. Darker than the photo, but they look great with the dress. And I can wear them with many things, since they're nude (with that fantastic shock of pink). Seriously. Amazing.

Photos!

As part of our package with our wonderful wedding photographer Emily Perello from Emily Takes Photos we got an "engagement session". So on Super Bowl Sunday we went out to the Albany Bulb and took photos!

You can see some highlights below in the slideshow or here on her blog. I recommend going to her blog if you want to see them larger.